How long’s your tether?

A cut rope, End of the Line, End of the Rope,End of Rope

I SAW a post, comical in nature but touching on a very delicate subject.  The reference was to someone being at the end of his or her tether but questioning how long the tether was and does anyone know when and where the tether actually starts? How is it that suddenly we’re at the end of it?

I decided to ponder the predicament; why is it indeed that all too frequently we wait until we have reached our limit to realise that we’ve let whatever it is go so far it brings us to a grinding halt?  How can it be that we unexpectedly find ourselves at breaking point with no prior inkling or warning that said limit was on the horizon or imminent.

It would seem it’s simply due to the fact that we tend to function on automatic pilot when in panic mode, literally until the point of distraction, reacting and combusting to the external influences and commitments of our day to day being all we can negotiate.  No time to reflect, ponder and consider alternative modes of action because there is no time to contemplate with a peaceful mind.

We concentrate on our jobs and working our way ‘up’ in life whilst always having to prove our worth. We expect the same for our children, frightful that if they don’t do well at school that they will have no opportunities later on in life. This gives to understand that they are not good enough just because they are themselves.

These priorities that demand a longer and more challenging school system to then become part of an automated and competitive work day, leaves little or no time to enjoy childhood or what it means to be a young adult in an exciting and diverse world; very little to look forward to.

I’ve taken the opportunity to ask my young interns about the things they stress over. Unanimously fear of failure and not living up to the demanding and incessant expectations of parents and teachers is a tremendous responsibility; the dread of not only not letting everyone down, but then being a failure in life because of it.

With the undeniable increasing numbers of suicide attempts within children from as early as the ages of nine and 10, we cannot afford to underestimate or diminish the impact our system is having on them.

I have worked closely with children for over 20 years and a loving home and appreciation of their efforts is often all they need when other basic life necessities are readily available. Helping our children find their way should be our only priority, not imposing our aspirations, nor stealing their innocence and sense of wonder.

This Saturday once again there is a Darkness into Light walk to remind us just how precious each life is; and that we’re here for one another, particularly if you’re at the end of your tether. • •

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Nicole King

One of Marbella's most glamorous residents, Nicole King offers a taste of the best of what's going on in the Costa del Sol.