Mother doesn’t let her now-adult daughter move back in after rent skyrockets

Young adults are finding it increasingly harder to move out of their parent’s homes due to soaring rent prices.

Rent prices continue to increase

In today’s challenging rental market, the age at which young adults leave the nest seems to be getting higher, and it isn’t because they don’t want to, it’s because they can’t afford to. 

In England, according to the government census, in the 12 months leading up to February 2024, the average monthly rents increased by 8.8 per cent, averaging at £1,276. 

The average monthly salary in the UK for ages between 18 and 21, according to Forbes, is only £1,911; this doesn’t leave much disposable income. 

Reddit post causes outrage

A recent Reddit post from a mother has sparked some controversy in this generational debate, bringing people to question parents’ methods and financial independence.

In the post, the mother deemed it “inappropriate” for her 25 year old daughter to move back home after her landlord jumped the price of her rent by a whopping 40 per cent.

This raised many questions about parental responsibility and young adults’ independence with the rising living costs. 

The mother of three shared her situation in the Reddit post, stating her eldest daughter had recently moved in with her boyfriend, but now wants to return to her mum’s home. 

The post detailed that the daughter had decided to move out with her boyfriend, who she had been with for four years prior, emphasising it was not a rash decision and her parents had supported their decision.

Rents skyrocket

Since the daughter had moved out, the average rent prices in the area have skyrocketed, more than doubling. Their landlord had increased the rent by 40 per cent within three months, making it impossible for them to stay.

Unfortunately, the young couple were not financially secure before this price jump, and the current market offers few options in their price range, making it difficult to find a new place within a short space of time; bearing in mind they would need to pay rent in their current place up until they leave, plus first months rent, last months rent and the security deposit of the new rental.

The Reddit post from the mother stated her daughter initially planned to live with her boyfriend’s parents on a temporary basis, to help them save and organise their finances.

Now, however, the parents will not let her move in with them. 

Trying to compromise

To ratify the situation they came to a compromise; she would return home, and he would move in with his parents. The daughter had even offered to pay rent at her parents house.

The plan was to save money during a six-month separation and find a new place together. 

This compromise caused tension within the family, with the Reddit user and her husband hesitant about their plan, believing their daughter must learn autonomy and independence, and navigate these financial challenges on her own. 

The significant rise in rental costs has placed greater pressure on the daughter, now a young adult, and lessens her ability to save and prepare for her future goals. 

A difficult situation for the daughter

In a difficult conclusion, the daughter has been made to move in with six other occupants in a two-bedroom apartment. While the parents understand the difficult situation, they stand by their decision that this will foster independence in their daughter.

This controversial Reddit post has sparked a discourse between young adults and parents, debating over the parents’ responsibility to support their children, and young adults’ responsibility to support themselves. 

Other users share their views

One user on Reddit commented their opinion on the matter, stating “Your daughter is an adult, but she’s still your daughter? She’s not relying on handouts. She’s offered to pay rent.” strongly adding that “You’re really gonna charge her the market average to live at home? She even gave you a timeline. I think you’re being unreasonable.”

Other users also shared their personal experiences, with one saying ‘“My own mom and I don’t get along, but she still gave me $4,000 to recover during a bad time. Now I’m making more money and was able to pay her back. It actually helped our relationship.”

Many other users took to the comments to defend the daughter, claiming the parents had responsibility to look after their daughter, with one stating “There’s wanting for her to learn to be an adult, and there’s being unreasonable jerks.”

A change in trends

Previous generations have followed a similar pathway, with parents financially supporting their children until they become adults, and young adults aiming to move out as they transition into adulthood. 

A new report from the Pew Research Center has revealed that this is trend changing, showing that many parents say they are still subsidising their adult children, sometimes well into their late 20s and early 30s.

In fact, A staggering 59 per cent of parents reported financially assisting their adult children in the past year.

Spain differs

A more commonly followed trend in Spain is to stay at home and look after your parents, supporting them physically and financially just as they did when they raised the child. However, this does not mean all young adults in Spain agree with this, or take the conventional route in life.

One young Spanish adult recently went viral on TikTok when he said he shouldn’t have to financially support his family or even himself, and instead they should continue to support him, stating, “If I didn’t ask to be born, why do I have to work now? Let them support me and that’s it”.

What do you think?

With student loan debts on the rise, in addition to the rise in the cost of living and average rent prices, it is becoming increasingly harder for young adults to move out, but does that mean their parents still have to financially support them, even later into their adulthood?