Russian Drama on Spanish ‘First Dates’

Russian Rollercoaster: Liubov Turns Up the Drama on Spain’s ‘First Dates’

The Spanish version of the popular TV programme ‘First Dates‘ has just served up another helping of pure, unfiltered, ridiculous chaos, courtesy of Liubov, a Russian artist with more drama than a Coronation Street Christmas special. If you thought your dates were bad, keep reading. Spoiler alert: it involves door acrobatics, clams, and some serious side-eye.

Lost in Translation

Liubov, who clearly missed the memo that ‘First Dates‘ isn’t a Cirque du Soleil audition, made her grand entrance by hanging off the door like Tom Cruise in ‘Mission: Impossible’. You could practically hear the theme tune. Poor Sergio, a 42-year-old rep from Barcelona, walked in expecting a regular date and instead got what looked like an outtake from a very weird Russian spy movie. Liubov, popping up from behind the bar like a surprise badger at a country fete, greeted him with a heartfelt, “I don’t like him; he’s not my type.” It’s not exactly the stuff of fairy tales.

Sergio, bless him, thought she was a new waitress and was left blinking like he’d just seen a paella in a tracksuit. It only got better (or worse, depending on your viewpoint) when she grilled him about his exes with all the tact of a tank, dismissing him with, “I’ll crush him right away, I’ll eat him.” Not sure what’s on the menu, but it’s not love.

Sergio’s Experience

Ever the good sport, Sergio tried to play along when Liubov decided it was time for a masterclass in clam slurping, with more in-your-face innuendo than a Carry-On film. But it was clear that Liubov’s idea of flirting was not landing; Sergio, eyes darting for the nearest exit, remarked, “It felt like she was here to advertise something, but I’ve no clue what. She wasn’t here to meet someone, that’s for sure.”

Liubov’s energy seemed more ‘Rasputin in a rave’ than ‘first date material’, and Sergio wasn’t having any of it. After her previous appearance on the Spanish version of First Dates, where she threw her shoe at her date, the shoe came off mid-date (again). In a final act of unparalleled romance, she plonked in her dental guard without so much as a quick rinse. Smooth operator.

Clowning Around

Liubov wrapped things up by touching every curtain and turning every step into an exaggerated performance, all while Sergio looked on in horror.

In the end, Liubov declared Sergio lacked “dominant male energy”, a blow to any bloke just trying to make it through a mad Monday date night. Sergio, not to be outdone, summed up his night as “like dealing with Rasputin on a sugar high.” They both agreed to call it a day, leaving us to ponder if Liubov’s looking for love or just her next big audience.

So, to those who ever feel their dating life’s a bit of a car crash, it’s important to remember that some people spend their evening dodging shoes and learning how to eat clams from behind a bar.

For the rest of us, it’s back to swiping right on Tinder and hoping for the best.

There’s no better way to practise one’s Spanish than watching ‘First Dates‘ on Spanish TV channel Cuatro.