By Mike Senker •
Published: 03 Dec 2020 • 16:58
I have had enough of all the politicians and TV experts telling everybody they have to do this and that during this pandemic. What should happen is they stop getting paid.
Get nothing, the same as millions are having to do. I listen to Piers Morgan et al giving expert advice whilst being paid millions and Piers flogging his book every five seconds. Things would soon change if they all stopped getting paid.
They come up with only stuff the type of person that does not live in the real world could do. Take the Christmas thing. One of my mates has three daughters.
They all have two kids so, according to the rules, only two daughters’ families can go round for lunch. How do you decide who’s not coming? Can you imagine ‘phoning up one of your kids and saying we’ve had a chat and decided as you’re our least favourite kid and so as not to break the rules you can’t come round. It’s nonsense and totally un-policeable.
I have another friend who has nine people living in his house and his brother has seven plus another kid who lives on his own but they can all get together. It’s a ridiculous situation. If that wasn’t bad enough they are even saying you can’t play games like Monopoly, Ludo and other board games.
If anyone is interested I’ve gone on to the deep web and found a couple of underground clubs that are allowing people to play Twister! It’s all a load of buzzcocks! My mother-in-law is 94 and has told my daughter she can’t go and visit her over Christmas because her two sons are coming over. If you do visit you’re told don’t hug, put your hand over your heart instead.
Then there’s the hospitality industry in absolute chaos. Can’t drink without a substantial meal when nobody has any idea what that consists of. You have to leave when you have finished your meal so people will just take longer to finish. The point is it doesn’t matter what the government say, people will just find a way round it.
So I have my Jehovah Witness advent calendar up – you just don’t open any of the doors .Plus I’ve heard all the expert spokespeople saying, “It’s the same for everyone. We’re all in the same boat.” What they forget to mention is that boat is the f***ing Titanic!
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Grumpy Old Man Mike Senker provokes laughter and some groans with his spot on observations of life in the modern age.
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